7 Requirements to Being a Leader Today

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To be a leader requires more than just knowledge… especially these days. Knowledge alone is not enough to get desired results. You must also have the more elusive ability to teach and to motivate. A teacher who is attempting to teach without inspiring the pupil with a desire to learn is hammering cold iron. This defines a leader; if you can’t teach and you can’t motivate, you can’t lead.

“Leadership is the ability to get individuals to work together for the common good and the best possible results while at the same time letting them know they did it themselves.” – John Wooden

Here are 7 requirements to being a great leader today:

1. You have to be adaptable.

Things change fast these days. Real fast. Just considering technology, it is advancing at compounding rates that leave even manufacturers struggling to keep up. You must lead a team that responds well to change.

“If we fail to adapt, we fail to move forward… If I am through learning, I am through… Failure is not fatal, but failure to change can be.” – John Wooden

2. You have to be moldable.

You must personally grow and change fast too… or you might be left behind. (This of course doesn’t mean you have to completely change your values, beliefs, or convictions on a regular basis. In fact, that may work against you in some ways.) We’re all imperfect and we all have needs. The prideful weak usually do not ask for help, so they stay weak. If we humbly recognize that we are imperfect, we will ask for help and we will pray for the guidance necessary to bring positive results to whatever we are doing.

3. You have to embrace a team approach.

There are no single heroes today. Not a single individual wins the Super Bowl, the NBA Finals, the World Series, the Stanley Cup, the World Cup, etc… it is a team that earns such a prize. Even in individual sports competition there are coaches, trainers, and other players competing involved. No successful business is the result of only a single person… besides, consumers and customers are needed even if it is a “one man operation.”

To be honest, there never really was such a thing as an isolated hero. Consider the big super hero movies owning the Hollywood box office this past decade: Batman and Superman never truly work alone, and then there are of course the Avengers and the X-men that are literally teams of super heroes.

“We can become great in the eyes of others, but we’ll never become successful when we compromise our character and show disloyalty toward friends or teammates. The reverse is also true: No individual or team will become great without loyalty… Much more can be accomplished by teamwork when no one is concerned about who gets credit.” – John Wooden

4. You have to consider social responsibility.

People want their individual work to make a difference. They also want the place where they spend their time, whether paid or volunteer, to make a difference. Nobody in their right mind wants to sneak through life without making any impact at all.

5. You have to think bigger than today.

Tomorrow is coming quicker than ever before and people are looking for leaders who can provide competent direction and consistent encouragement. (Time really is constantly speeding up throughout your life. We experience and perceive time from the perspective in which we live… and when you are 50+ years old, a day appears as a much smaller fraction than it did when you were only 7 years old.)

6. You have to be willing to serve others.

People will no longer follow a simply autocratic leader. Much of our society today seems to be less loyal than in generations passed. If you want to remain a leader today, you must prove you care for people personally. Trust and authenticity is more important than appearing to have all the answers.

“A leader’s most powerful ally is his or her own example.” – John Wooden

7. You have to allow others to receive credit and assume authority.

It’s what attracts leaders to your team these days. They want to feel they are playing a part in the team’s success. I’ve never met or heard of a guy who honestly wanted to be a part of a championship caliber team, but then have zero contribution to that team.

“Goals achieved with little effort are seldom worthwhile or lasting.” – John Wooden

These are some of the key elements required in leadership today. I realize this brings some unique challenges for spiritual leaders. We have a message of good news and faith that is unwavering… and that needs to stay that way. I certainly don’t intend to continually “change my message” or attempt to alter the Gospel. As a Christian leader, though, we must understand the context of culture in which we find ourselves. The way we lead, motivate, and recruit people to join in stewarding God’s resources has changed (and will continue to change). If we don’t recognize that, we will be less successful in accomplishing our God-given assignments.

Thankfully, in the end, when and where we are weak… God is strong (Romans 5:6-11; 1st Corinthians 1:17-31, 4:10; 2nd Corinthians 11:30, 12:9-10, 13:4, 9).

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Why Marriage (Really) Isn’t For You

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There is an article currently going around entitled “Marriage Isn’t For You” that rightly explains that marriage should not be a self-centered commitment in which oneself is concerned only with their own happiness. C.S. Lewis actually addressed this in his work Mere Christianity when he stated, “The natural life in each of us is something self-centred, something that wants to be petted and admired, to take advantage of other lives, to exploit the whole universe. . . . [The natural life] knows that if the spiritual life gets hold of it, all its self-centredness and self-will are going to be killed and it is ready to fight tooth and nail to avoid that.”

As I was reading the article though, I kept getting this nagging feeling that something big was missing… while the article makes some very good points, it is overall a bit short-sighted. It claims that marriage is not about yourself, but rather about your spouse, that it’s about family. That it is about making them happy and helping them to realize and actualize “their wants, their needs, their hopes, and their dreams.” I would agree that falling in love in a Christian way is to say to your potential spouse, ‘I am excited about your future and I want to be a part of getting you there. I’m signing up for the journey with you. Would you sign up for the journey to my true self with me? It’s going to be hard, but I want to get there, and get there with you.’ However, there is more beyond that.

While I think this article truly has good intentions and contains some great truths, I don’t believe that it takes its thesis anywhere near far enough. What if marriage is not about who you marry, but why? What if being ‘in love’ isn’t a good enough reason to get married? What if dating isn’t about finding ‘the one,’ but about serving the One who loves you most? What if marriage isn’t about your happiness, but rather your holiness? Yes, marriage is not for you, but ultimately it is not just about or for your spouse either… it’s for God (Ephesians 5:22-33). It’s a shadow of something much greater than us.

The wedding ceremony and marriage between two people is not ultimately about celebrating the two of them, but rather it is celebrating the love that Christ has displayed for His Bride. Ephesians 5 tells us that marriage is not ultimately about sex or social stability or personal fulfillment; rather marriage was created to be a human reflection of the ultimate love relationship with the Lord. It points to the true marriage that our souls need and the true family our hearts want. For my wife and me, it is our hope to preach the Gospel through our marriage as God has chosen the story of our lives to be a shadow of His much greater narrative.

So, like the author claims, marriage is definitely not about making yourself “happy,” but it’s not always about making your spouse happy either. The marriage relationship between two people will never be unblemished and someday it will end in the death of one, and eventually both people. The only love that won’t disappoint you is one that can’t change, that can’t be lost, that is not based on the ups and downs of life or of how well you live. It is something that not even death can take away from you. God’s love is the only thing like that; God’s triune love is actually the most selfless love there is. True love is focused on God, and that sometimes means making people unhappy in order to draw them closer to God. Marriage is not simply about making your spouse smile or laugh every day. Marriage is not always about being nice, it’s about loving your spouse as God loves them. As C.S. Lewis eloquently explains in his work The Problem of Pain, “Love may forgive all infirmities and love still in spite of them: but Love cannot cease to will their removal.” Marriage isn’t merely about happiness, it’s about holiness.

Truthfully, this means that sometimes you will make your spouse sad, sometimes you will make your spouse angry, and sometimes you will even unfortunately make your spouse cry. However, the beauty of marriage is still displayed in these moments, where you challenge your spouse to better love God even when it makes them unhappy. Jesus even said, “I want you to follow me so fully, so intensely, so enduringly that all other attachments in your life look weak by comparison.” (Matthew 10:34-39; Luke 14:25-35; John 12:25-26)

So, the author did have it right: marriage isn’t for you, but it’s not for your spouse either; it’s also not just about the both of you… Marriage is meant to symbolize the beauty of the human soul espoused to Christ. As Martin Luther stated in The Freedom of a Christian, “Who can understand the riches of the glory of this grace? Here this rich and divine bridegroom Christ marries this poor, wicked harlot, redeems her from all her evil, and adorns her with all His goodness. Her sins cannot now destroy her, since they are laid upon Christ and swallowed up by Him. And she has that righteousness in Christ, her husband, of which she may boast as of her own and which she can confidently display alongside her sins in the face of death and hell and say, ‘Though I have sinned, yet my Christ, in whom I believe, has not sinned, and all His is mine and all mine is His.'” And our earthly marriage gets to be a reflection of that beautiful union. Marriage is ultimately for God.

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Related article: Pain in Marriage: For Your Joy